Value. What does it mean to value yourself? I think that you can only really value yourself if you feel that you (yes, you) are worth something and your opinions, feelings, likes (or dislikes) matter.
Having a disability has sometimes made me feel valueless, and that would impact on how I do things (or not do things!). This has changed, still not perfect, but life is a work in progress after all! I am glad it has changed though. I like the strong inner voice I am building. It makes me feel powerful, it is what gives me the strength to write this post.
Even though I have started valuing myself, I still have times where I value the needs of others or the needs of my job, before my own health, wellbeing or just do something I like. I also give up my time for other people (this isn’t a bad thing, but I suppose it’s the reason why a person needs to think about). I want to help others, but not at the expense of myself and that shouldn’t be the defining factor of my self-worth. I (and, in my opinion, we all should) should already know and appreciate my own worth.
What I struggle with sometimes is that I find it hard to ask for what I need, especially if that is because I can’t see very well. I used to say nothing, just let things be, let this stuff carry on. It didn’t matter if my eyes were strained or I couldn’t see the PowerPoint – it wasn’t an issue I’d want to address because I didn’t think I was important. I would sacrifice my engagement in something, or my learning, because I didn’t value myself enough to ask. I didn’t want to make a fuss. But I started to realise that I am important. I must apologise though, I don’t think there is a magic formula to realising this! Nevertheless, I ask when I need (or even want…) something now. It’s not a big deal anymore. Whether that’s asking a colleague what colours a bar chart is, or whether I am writing in red pen (!). What changed was me realising, that being visually impaired doesn’t mean I don’t have anything to give – I can do well at anything I put my mind too (well, almost anything!). So I have a right to succeed just as much as anyone else. (Oh and I will do by the way – right now I am a force to be reckoned with!)
Society may help or hinder you to find your value. Society plays an important role. I listened to an amazing TED talk (thank you to my special WhatsApp group for that!) and it made me think. If those in power show us that disabled people are valued, by ensuring new policies or infrastructure consider accessibility from the offset, maybe that would help signal to disabled people that they are valued in society. Disability should not be an afterthought.
So what I am saying (I think!) is valuing yourself is important. It is important to look after yourself and remember that no matter what you can’t do, you are important. You deserve anything you want in life and you have the power to make that happen. Feel your value and use your power.
Amazing TED talk here: https://www.ted.com/talks/elise_roy_when_we_design_for_disability_we_all_benefit
disabilityandme.net 