Disability and my awkward moments

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Being visually impaired has led to some really awkward moments, probably just not for me but for other people too! Yes, most are funny, but at the time, I wanted to run away, curl into the foetal position or plain never see those people again.

  1. I don’t think I have told this story before now, because I was so embarrassed I literally did not know where to look. Somehow, I had left my loo door open, in my first week of a new job, and the cleaner opened the door (to clean the toilets) and there I was. I didn’t see that the door wasn’t locked somehow (or maybe I thought I was locking it and it unlocked, I don’t know). I kept on seeing this cleaner around, I did not know what to say to her (I apologised loads at the time).
  2. This I have done more than once, cars, I can’t see inside cars until I open the door. So, if someone doesn’t tell me where to go in, I can easily end up opening the door of the car, to find someone already in that seat. Especially awkward, because you don’t know whether to say hello to the person (style it out like it’s intentional) or apologise lots. I try and style it out, I most certainly fail.
  3. Not recognising who people are or overfamiliarity with strangers. This is an awful one, it was really sunny in the office and someone came down to sit next to me (open plan office with few spare seats). The sun was too bright. I could only see this person’s outline, unless they got out of the shade. I couldn’t really work out much, but I had this odd feeling I knew him, because I heard him speak on the phone but I couldn’t be sure. Anyway, instead of saying hello I said nothing and I was just stressed for the whole afternoon. After a few hours, he got up to leave for the day and I realised it was an old colleague of mine! I can’t remember if I apologised or said nothing, but that awkwardness was way too much. This leads perfectly into overfamiliarity with strangers. Thinking I recognise someone, but then they turn out not to be the person I thought I thought they were! I have done this recently at a party. I tapped someone saying hello, before realising I had no idea who they were. I made small talk and swiftly moved on!
  4. Fall over in front of people. Ok, so most times this just plain hurts rather than anything else. However, a few years ago I was in Coventry. There was a slope and l fell into the mud, right on my back. You can imagine how that one looked. I got up and laughed it off. It was really really funny, but I spent the rest of my journey trying to cover it up, I was meeting new people and I didn’t want them to think the worst (!).
  5. When strangers ask me if I need glasses. I have had so many strangers ask me if I have forgotten my glasses or if I need my eyes checked. I never quite know what to say to them. I normally say I have got a genetic eye condition and glasses can’t fix it. Most people are happy with that response, but not everyone. I remember having a meeting with someone once, who after I said this, came out with, “well I was going to say if you want to go back and get your glasses, I can wait” (I just told you I don’t have glasses!). The worst one from recent times was one response from someone on the tube, “I look like a right prat now” (well you kind of do, but that’s OK, I know I must be an interesting distraction on an incredibly long tube journey).

Anyway, I hope that has cheered you up on possibly the most depressing January of all time. Let’s hope February perks everyone up… #dumptrump.

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